I like designing new workshops and working on new ideas as much as possible.  So far, I’ve only repeated one course within the Queen’s University Open Learning Programme.  That was my 1-day workshop called Body to Body: How To Communicate Without Words.  Read about it here.  Now, I intend to add to this repeated course hall of fame.  On Saturday, 31 May 2008 I delivered a workshop called Confident Conversations: How to Talk in Any Situation.  Or, as I called it my my post-workshop report blog, The Art of Talking Without Talking.

We will run this course again on Saturday 7 November 2009.  I’ve received word from Queen’s that there are already enough people enrolled for the course to get the official go-ahead.  So go ahead, sign up, you won’t be alone!

If you want to know more about the content or focus of this course, please lick on the links above.  To book a please, go to public events section of our current events schedule here.  You have to book through Queen’s rather than Sensei.

Look forward to talking to you there!

Image credit: [nati].

If you’re an 80s child like me, you’ll remember Benji, Zax and the Alien Prince.  It was a kids sci-fi series about the earth-bound adventures of a dork, a droid, and a disgustingly cute dog called Benji.  Benji went on to star in other series and films of his own.  In all of them, he repeatedly showed that cutie-pie ‘I’m a little, stray puppy-wuppy, pretty please be my friend’ face till I fainted with saccharine over-exposure.

Later, as I became a smarty-pants teen, I learned to call this an anthropomorphism.  This is “the attribution of uniquely human characteristics to non-human creatures and beings” like dogs.  It is a fallacy of human reasoning, albeit a popular one.  It explains, for instance, why it is now illegal to hunt foxes, but not rats.  Whether such undue sentiment is the effect of anthropomorphic irrationality, or its cause, is open to dispute.

At any rate, we come to the crux.  Can dogs really look ‘guilty’? the article asks.  I’ll answer in a word.  No.

“That “guilty look” on a dog’s face is all in the imagination of the human owner, suggests research.  Dog owners have often claimed they can read the expressions of their pets – particularly that tell-tale look when they have done something wrong.  But researchers at a New York college tricked owners into thinking innocent pets had misbehaved – with the owners still claiming to see this guilty look.  The study found that the expression had no relation to the dogs’ behaviour.  And researchers found that pet owners’ belief that they could read their dogs’ “body language” was often entirely unfounded.”

I’ve bloged before about my increasing anxiety with body language claims for humans.  But this is taking the doggy-biscuit.

Look at these pictures here and here as deluded owners try to prove their point.

Sad.  In both senses of the word.  Always was.  And now science has proved it.

Indian sex workers learn karate says the title of the article.  I am unimpressed.

Prostitutes in an Indian state have started taking karate lessons to help protect themselves against violent pimps and ‘customers’.  If you go to the article, there is a short film of them in training.  Natural feelings of sympathy for their plight are compounded.  The training will serve them poorly.

On Saturday 23 May 2008 I delivered a 1-day workshop called Streetwise: How to Protect Yourself Against Aggression.  The vast majority of those there were woman.  Half of the day was spent explaining the difference between aggression and assertiveness, and training students in the art of using assertive words and body language in situations of conflict.

In the second half of the day we got physical. With the help of my colleague Matthew Arrell we demonstrated some basic moves in self-defence.

Real self-defence is not a sport or even a system.  It is basic.  It is not for the squeamish.

It employs various principles like:

(1) ‘Hit and run’ – Your task is NOT to get involved in a brawl, but, if attacked, to overpower the aggressor with massive force and get the heck out of there.

(2) ‘Hardest to Softest’ – Forget about the fancy kicks and blocks of Hollywood lore.  Forget also about the grips and locks of some self-defence books.  They are worse than useless; they will put you in danger.  Palm strikes to face, palm slaps to the ears, eye strikes, use of knees and elbows – these are the tools of the trade.

Above all, I emphasise that awareness is everything.  Ninety percent of self-protection is personal security.

If it comes to violence, then something has usually gone wrong.  You have allowed yourself to be put in that situation.  So we trained our class in threat awareness, how to spot the danger signs, how to keep mentally alert, what situations to particularly watch out for, and how to reduce risk to yourself.  This is more important than any amount of pseudo Bruce Lee type training.

One of the best teachers of real self-defence around today is an English chap called Geoff Thompson.  (He’s now also an author and playwright of some repute.)  See him in action teaching his famous ‘fence’ technique here.

We’re planning to start up our own short courses on self-defence for woman in the near future (at the request of some of the students).

There is a gap in the market for this.  People don’t want martial arts training that lasts years and isn’t intended for the streets anyway.  We’ll keep you informed.

In the meantime, as trite as it may sound, my only advice  is – If you don’t want to be attacked, get out of the attack zone.  This applies as much to poor Indian prostitutes as it does to silly, drunken ladettes who walk home in the dark, alone.

Image credit:  filipe ferreira.

But maybe I’m having second thoughts.

Why?  Because of a recent BBC news article, that’s why.  The troubling piece is called Woman’s traits ‘written on face’.  Some Glasgow University boffins claim ‘that women’s faces were easier to read than men’s faces, with greater success in matching traits.’  Fair ’nuff so far.  Women are both more expressive and more astute at picking up emotional cues from facial expressions.  But two problems present themselves.

First off, this study was not about external expressions, but personality traits, or ‘ subtle aspects of psychological make-up’.

And second, from this, we’re not talking about stuff like anger, fear or sadness here.  No, we’re talking about reading whether someone is ‘lucky, humorous, religious and trustworthy’ from their face!  I mean, come on.  A ‘lucky’ face?  You’re having a laugh, mate.  (So is that a ‘humorous’ face then?  Never mind…)

I don’t like all this for a few reasons.  First, it seems hardly distinguishable from the ancient pseudo-science of physiognomy, or the ‘art’ of reading personality from body.  Haven’t they heard of the parables of The Hunchback of Notre Dame or The Portrait of Dorian Grey?

Second, sorry to go all PC here, but isn’t this a little sexist?  It either patronises men by saying that women have some ‘special power’ that we don’t.  Or it patronises women by trying to sell them the notion in the first place.

And speaking of gender, I’ve always had a hard time selling the power of non-verbal communication to some of my male friends.  They argue that body language is greatly exaggerated, fictitious, or a distraction to communication that they don’t want in their heads.

Maybe they’re onto something and I need to rethink my views.  Or maybe they just need some plastic surgery to make them more lucky.

We are holding a workshop – Assertiveness and Workplace Confidence – at QUB, Belfast on Wednesday 18-19 February.

The realities of modern work life – flat structures, tough workloads and the need to exert influence across traditional boundaries – ensure that assertiveness skills are not an optional extra.  Aggression is unacceptable; passivity is ineffective. In this workshop you will learn an powerful set of techniques and how to use them in specific workplace scenarios, such as when negotiating or influencing.  also covered are the relationships between assertiveness and more general work-related issues, like the conflict created when giving criticism and receiving feedback. There will be special attention paid to the issue of communication in work, focusing on how delegates can build up a repetoire of assertive non-verbal communication styles and employ assertive ‘power’-words and persuasive phrases.

After participating in the two-day programme, delegates will be able to:

• Communicate their chosen message in the workplace with confidence and clarity
• Competently handle workplace scenarios that test assertiveness to the limits
• Recognise the different dynamics involved in workplace power and perception
• Plan and practice successful assertive behaviour in a step-by-step way

This course will be presented as a mixture of presentation, group discussion, role-plays and personal exercises.  While the principles which underpin this course are common to all expressions of assertive performance, the specific focus of the course is on workplace assertiveness.  Therefore, the circumstances and problems dealt with are taken from the world of work rather than, say, personal life or family relationships.

The course will be of benefit to a broad range of professional, managerial, and supervisory personnel, including those in the sales and service sectors.  Anyone who communicates with others within the workplace will find it of immediate and lasting benefit.  No previous knowledge or level of attainment is required.

This is a Short Courses Programmes (CPD) event and costs £390.

To book a place, phone Marc Forte at the School of Education (Short Courses Programmes) on 028 9097 5260 or email cpd@qub.ac.uk.

Image credit: prajuvikas.

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